This Blog 2019, Goals and Grommets

Inspired by the 2019 goals post over at Charles's Dragons Never Forget Blog, I figured I would do the same thing. 2018 right around ...

Wednesday, December 14, 2016

Random NPC appearance, features, oddities, habits, perhaps some strangeness.

This post is just for fun. Use it at your own risk.

Modern, post apocalypse, undercity dwelling, odd ball NPC's

Chart 1:
NPC is 1d6:
1-2 Male
3-4 Female
5-6 Given their present state and manner of dress it's impossible to tell.

Chart: 2 Stature
Roll 1d6: on a roll of 1 to 4 the person is of average stature on a roll of 5 or 6 roll on the chart below.
  1. Person is hunched over, drags a leg when they walk. Hard to tell a true height.
  2. Person is extremely tall, over 6 foot 5 inches, thin as a rail.
  3. Person is  very small. just about  4 foot tall.
  4. Person Morbidly obese.
  5. Person is of average height and very muscular.
  6. Strikingly statuesque and hansom.
  7. This person is below average in height  and heavy set, wears large platform shoes for a bit of extra lift.
  8. This person is tall well over 6 foot and heavy set, a human wall.
  9. This person wears super baggy clothing that dragon on the floor behind them, impossible to gage height or weight.
  10. This person is small and frail.
Chart 3:  Hair
Roll 1d6 
0-1 Brown OR generally dark
2 Blonde
3 Black
4 Red or Auburn.
5 Grey
6 Roll on the 3a chart below.

Chart 3a Hair Cont: (Use chart above to determine natural hair color if you in this case roll 1d6-1)

  1. Mohawk large,  multi colored.
  2. Massive long dreadlocks.
  3. Long hair woven through with  cables and rubber tubes.
  4. Head shaved bald, but hair drawn on  with  markers
  5. large very colorful mane of hair. 
  6. Tight Afro with circles shaved shaved into it.
  7. Tight afro with complex designs shaved into the side.
  8. Extremely tall High top fade.
  9. No hair, Feathers.
  10. Faux-Hawk
  11. Long hair down to the person's ankles.
  12. A HUGE afro.
  13. Many tiny braids that stick out all over the place
  14.  A beehive hair do that contains actual bees.
  15.  Just a disheveled rats nest.
  16. The  worst combover you have ever seen.
  17. Spiked Mohawk
  18. Head covered in tattoos.
  19. Normal hair-doo with a nasty scar running across their head.
  20. Who the hell knows they always wear that damn hat (roll on hart 3b no seriously I have a hat chart..
Chart 3b Yeah hats why not. (d20)
  1. A very tall top hat.
  2. A multi color bowler
  3. A pirate hat with a dead pigeon stapled to it.
  4. A straw hat.
  5. One of those hats that can hold cans of beer..
  6. A bright red ascot cap
  7. A beanie with a rather large and sharp looking propeller on top.
  8. A coonskin cap  that may or may not be raccoon.
  9. Wears a dunce cap with the  word "Estúpido" brightly emblazoned across it.
  10. A blue fez
  11. A bright yellow hard hat.
  12. A fantastically oversized blue knit cap.
  13. A white phrygian cap
  14. A massive sombrero. The bring  has several hundred fire crackers taped to it.
  15. A trucker cap with and obscene saying on the front panel.
  16. A furry russian Ushanka. On Closer inspection there is a large microphone buried in the fur.
  17. A very large brightly colored turban.
  18. A felt Trilby
  19. A pill box hat that is in fact filled with  various pills.
  20. A living animal wrapped around their head (D6) 1. Snake 2. large ferret or weasel 3 a living raccoon 4. a pile of living rodents 5, a rarge turtle 6.a large vulture in a bird's nest strapped on their head
Chart 4: At first glance this stands out...(D20)
  1.  Carries a drill with a frayed cord, sometimes stops to make “whirring” drill noises with their mouth.
  2.  Once broke their neck and it never healed right, now they walk around with this messed up crooked neck.
  3. Carries a bible or similar religious text, Loudly and randomly quotes out of it often.The quotes are never in context.
  4.  Has shaved one half of their head and apparently attempted self-Trepanning. Their brain can clearly be seen through a one inch square hole cut in their skull which is covered with clear plastic wrap.
  5. Has a huge swollen left eye. Looks like they got hit with a bat. If asked , thinks  there is  a small pixie living under their eye-lid
  6. Everywhere they go they carry a desiccated corpse rolled in a blanket over their shoulders.
  7. They wear a long trench coat with a multitude of dead rats sewn onto the inside. You smell the rats long before you see them.
  8. They collect lost keys and carry several hundred random door, car, and padlock keys all over their person. They jingle loudly when they move.
  9. Wears a bandoleer full of baby food jars, each jar contains a different liquid.
  10. Carries a pistol which has badly bent barrel. Claims it once belonged to a famous gunfighter.  
  11. Dresses like a scarecrow, complete with  rotting  pumpkin mask.
  12. Wears a child's xylophone around their neck. Hammers on it  absently when not engaged in conversation.
  13. Person  never wears a shirt and is extremely hairy.
  14. This person has a glorious beard that hangs down to their midriff. It is well combed, well tended, and a local legend.
  15. Person has OCD their clothing is immaculate and they stop to lint roll it ever few minutes, 6 passes over each arm, each leg, and the chest.
  16. Person is wearing olives on  all of their fingers.
  17. Person carries a paperboy style satchel filled with rusty circular saw blades.. 
  18. Is wearing a hooded white dress covered in eyeless white masks. 
  19. Has one arm amputated just above the elbow, has ties several chains to the remaining section fo arm.
  20. Is wearing a completely leather suit, leather vest, leather pants, everything thing shiny black leather.
Upon furhter investigation, this person:
  1. Claims to be A finder of nibs. This person is always searching for “Nibs”, while never defining what exactly a “nib” is.
  2. Asks often "do you think it's going to rain today?" as if they are desperate to know. Asks even if it's raining.
  3. Tells obvious lies wiht almost every statement.
  4. Has a fake eye, the has tiny engraved letters which read.. (1d6) 1 "If you can read this your're close enough to kill." 2. "Acme Eye works" 3. " Tell how my breath is" 4 "Acme Laser eye [tm], Caution, do not stare directly into Acme Laser eye." 5, "Hell hath no Rage" 5 "Ohh Oedipus Wrecks!" 
  5. calls all men Jeffy, and all women Beth.
  6. Greets every one like they are the oldest of Friends.
  7. Has horrible body odor, It's like a cross between garlic, sweat, and bad life choices.
  8. is intoxicated...
  9. knows a lot of things.. very interesting secret things... Are they making it all up?
  10. only wants to talk about insects.
  11.  is being followed around by a bodyguard and a three person film crew.
  12. Has a joke for pretty much every topic of conversation.
  13. Will try to sell you. (1d6) 1. Tiny broken bits of electronics 2.The deed to their share of a lost mine somewhere to the west, 3. A rancid sandwich 4.Organs 5. A book that they claim is banned in  twelve countries. 6. Drugs, all kinds of drugs.
  14. Is searching for their lost child.
  15. Paints revolutionary graffiti, has cans in a bag, paint on their hands and a black mask in their hood.. The real deal.. willing to  die before they stop painting anti government images. Jail is not an option. 
  16. Is a great connoisseur of wine, carries an empty bottle of their favorite vintage, claims to be from France.
  17. Is a professional independent wrestler. Drinks a shit-ton (that,s metric) of protein
  18. Claims to be a rich professional. Has a drug issue, has woman issues, has honesty issues, just plain has issues, loves to talk  about his problems.
  19. Leaves no room fro other peoples opinions.
  20. Over complicated every issue discussed, analyzes things to oblivion loves to talk...
I might continue this at some point... but this is enough for now.

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